Mother's Day

Mother's Day was a special treat for me. After a little difficult time with Sofia yesterday at the feis, I realized there were some things I didn't understand about her, and I really wanted to understand her better, so I can be a better mom to her. We spent an hour talking which was a little difficult for me, as she wasn't very enthused ( I had envisioned skipping hand in hand to the playgorund nearby, but instead she kept wanting to go back and turned her back on me), but fortunately she did talk and helped me understand her better and get closer to and more appreciative of her. She explained to me that it was indeed a little hard for her to see Lilian enjoy the feis and all of our attention was going to her, adn that she had to stay there all day supporting Lilian. I explained that I was sorry that I didn't realize this timely, and that it would help for her to tell me. It is not bad to feel some jealousy, as long as you don't act on it (and she has been terrrific about all the things that Lilian has been able to do without her, even though she must have felt some of this jealousy quite a few times). She also explained that sometimes she just wants to be on her own, while other times she would like some extra attention. I encouraged her to tell me these feelings when they come up, as I don't always (often not) understand when she needs what, and that I often misread her and do just the opposite of what she needs. She promised to try to tell me more clearly, and also asked me to not 'treat her like a baby' in the morning (admittedly I do just that, helping them wash their hair, and dry off, holding their towels up so they can be wrapped up warmly right out of the bath-tub. For me just an act of special time before sending them off to school, and a way of explicitly showing them love by service). She suggested to get her an alarm clock so she could get herself and Lilian up and bathed, get herself breakfast, etc. So I promised I would give her the chance to 'prove' herself, adn set my clock 40 minutes later than hers, so we could still get to school in time if she didn't get herself up in time. She sure proved herself 100x over,what an independent special girl she is!
Well, did she make a difference in all of our lives:
1st: they have been to school way on time since then!
2nd: way less contention or yelling in the morning to hurry, hurry, hurry, as they are done before I get up
3rd: wyaa less hectic time for me, as I don't have to 'baby' them in the morning, I just have to make lunch
4th: and she gave me the gift I have most craved for in the last 8 years: the gift of sleep!!! 40 extra minutesd each morning makes a big difference! What a wonderful treat, and how amazing to see my girls grow up so much each day!
Thank you Sofia, I love you!